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This has been a weekend of extremes and opposites. I have gone from the deepest trenches to the highest heights and I am feeling conflicting emotions and thinking conflicting thoughts.
It started on Friday morning with a Skype call from Ukraine. I was able to speak to one of my dear friends for the first time in nine years with the help of another Ukranian friend acting as the interpreter. My friend Natasha said her heart was beating so hard she thought it would come out of her chest! The whole time was just saturated with Holy Spirit. By the time we prayed at the end of the hour, the presence of God was so strong that all I could think about was how awesome it must be in Heaven. I remembered why I never wanted to leave Ukraine.
Friday and Saturday night were spent at a conference. The Lord felt so close and our minds were filled with truth. Somehow, in between all that there was a lot of “stuff” happening. Things to deal with and figure out. Things that were honestly way beyond our ability and human wisdom to tackle.
By Sunday, we were just physically wiped out, emotionally drained and like I said before, a little confused. I decided it was best not to even give my feelings a chance to speak. This morning as we prayed, I had a clearer understanding of what had happened, why we felt the way we did and what God was after in all of this.
When I was a kid, older Christians would describe part of my weekend as “mountain top experience”. Then they would sort of pat us on our heads and tell us that we have to come down. The coming down is always the hard part. The confusion of that whole process was answered by what God revealed to me today. He showed me that although we have to “come down” and live our every day lives, He doesn’t want us to leave everything He imparted to us on the mountain behind.
The words He had me pray today were, “Give us integration of revelation.” When He opens the Heavens and imparts to us things of the Spirit, it is not so we can leave and say. “I met with God. How cool.” He opens the Heavens and gives us revelation so that those things of Heaven change our spiritual DNA and become a part of who we are. As the the nature of God becomes more amore a part of who we are, then His Spirit has more influence in the Earth and on the people with whom we are in contact. Be encouraged to reach for the Heavens but don’t stop there; let God integrate what you find there into who you are and then impart it to others.
2 Corinthians 4:6-7
6For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.
7But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us.
Today I am really thankful to be home with nothing pressing to do at the moment except to press into God and the moment. I love to go and do but in my heart of hearts I am more of a “be-er” than a “do-er” and there is no place I’d rather be than in the presence of the Lord. Besides, it is in these quiet moments that I finally get to engage in my other passion; writing.
I love having this time to reflect and share what God has been doing. Most of you know that my healing is coming at a more rapid pace now. Once I got to the gym and saw how much healing had taken place since the last time I’d worked out, I really almost couldn’t believe it myself! I knew this was the time to focus on my healing like never before because it was no longer something to pray would manifest. It was already happening in a visible way and time to pray into what we were seeing.
I know from experience how effective healing prayer is, especially in a situation like mine so I tried to gather some people to “soak” me in prayer. It just was not coming together, but I kept trying and kept going to the gym and watching the healing progress.
On Tuesday I went to the gym and was blown away again at the rapid progress. Tuesday night I did an interview for the In My Pajamas Show (you can listen to that interview at www.Blogtalkradio.com/inmypajamasshow) and shared what has happened and what is happening. It’s always fun to give God glory for what He is doing! He’s hard to keep up with, though, because He is always doing something new and it seems that the more we praise Him the more He gives us something to praise about!
I got home after the interview and got into bed when I got an unexpected phone call from a neighbor who I haven’t heard from in about a year. She seemed really excited and was a little hard to follow but she mentioned that she was with Dennis Brown. He runs the Healing Rooms in Charlotte and I am very familiar with him and I love the work he does, so I was starting to clue in. Ten my neighbor asked if she could come pray for me. I was thrilled! This is exactly what I’d been needing and God had it all set up! So I told her to come on over, thinking it was she and her husband.
Well, it was she an her husband and about eight other people plus Dennis! Apparently, Dennis was teaching a class on healing prayer and praying for the sick and the entire class came and I became the object lesson. How cool is that? I had been asking for soaking prayer and there was a whole class meeting in my neighborhood just itching to lay hands on the sick and the Holy Spirit put me on their hearts at just the right time. Of course God honored their prayers with His presence and I am certain we will get to see the results when I get back to the gym.
This is happening so rapidly that I bought a little video recorder to take to the gym so I can start posting the results on YouTube. Stay tuned…
Matthew 4:24 (Whole Chapter)
So the report of Him spread throughout all Syria, and they brought Him all who were sick, those afflicted with various diseases and torments, those under the power of demons, and epileptics, and paralyzed people, and He healed them.
I love this season of Passover, Good Friday and Resurrection Day. I am in more awe at the magnificent plan of God every year! This year I am a little more in awe because today is not only Good Friday, the day the Passover Lamb was sacrificed, but it is also the 30th anniversary of a very special and personal passover.
Thirty years ago today one of the largest tornadoes in recent history ripped through Wichita Falls, Texas destroying thousands of people’s homes and killing 42. Our home was destroyed while my parents,grandmother, dog, brother and myself huddled in a closet. The chimney fell into our living room. If it had fallen just inches in a different direction we would have all been crushed. None of us even had a scratch.
It seems that every year I live I am increasingly aware that it was surely the Hand of God that protected us. Just before the tornado hit, my mom handed a Bible to my brother and told him to read Psalm 91. Many people talk about the noise of that enormous storm, but honestly, the only thing I ever remember hearing was the sound of my mother’s prayers. I hadn’t thought about it until this year, but ironically, the tornado hit during Passover.
I look to that event as those in the Old Testament looked at the altars they built to commerate the Great things God had done for them so that future generations would know of the faithfulness of God. So I write about this event and post the photos not to re-live a tragedy, but to show that God was faithful to His Word. Everyone was hurt that day; some more than others. I mourn with those who lost more than just their homes. Sometimes there is a bit of survivors guilt that makes it hard, but I must give God the glory for what He did that day for my family.
Sometimes the healing takes a long time. The sting may never go away completely, but our God is a God of redemption and in the end, He makes all things beautiful. For my family, the redemption came two years ago with the birth of my brothers son Ethan on April 10, 2007. God has given us something to rejoice over on a day that is referred to as Terrible Tuesday to all who knew of it. Thank you Jesus, Our Redeemer for keeping us alive to see your redemption in the next generation.
The photos from left to right:
1. The merged tornadoes on the ground
2. My street
3. My living room
4. The four funnels just before they merged
I think one of the biggest temptations in the season we are in right now is fear. I think too often we don’t even regard living in fear as sin. It almost feels mean in our culture to think of fear as a temptation. We tend to have a lot more mercy on someone who is being tempted by or in the grip of fear than someone, say tempted by lust, greed, or anger.
I have a sense that we don’t as easily see the destructive power of fear as readily as we do some other sins. What if we could see right away on our faithometer the effects of fear? What if we could see the door opening and the enemy getting a foothold when we give in to worry?
For me, fear is a sign of two things; I’ve lost my focus and/or there is something in my life I need to surrender to the Lord. Look at Moses as an example. He had to have been terrified to go speak to Pharaoh, but he surrendered his life to God even to the point of death (Pharaoh could have easily accomplished that) and he kept his eye on the Lord.
Hebrews 11:27
It was by faith that Moses left the land of Egypt, not fearing the king’s anger. He kept right on going because he kept his eyes on the one who is invisible.
Our enemy is the master terrorist. If he can get you in fear, and your eyes off the Lord then he can turn your faith to unbelief and he will have won. The way to counter his attacks is to refuse the temptation, focus on who God is and what He has promised and realize that no matter how bad things look, the enemy loses when we continue to put our trust in the Lord and love and obey Him. The enemy simply cannot understand that kind of loyalty and he cannot overcome that kind of faith.
So we can say with confidence,“The Lord is my helper,so I will have no fear.What can mere people do to me?” [ Ps 118:6.]
Passage 2 Timothy 1:7:
7For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (of cowardice, of craven and cringing and fawning fear), but [He has given us a spirit] of power and of love and of calm and well-balanced mind and discipline and self-control.
Paralyzed woman hopes her story will inspire others
She plans to run the New York City Marathon one day — she just needs to walk first.
Though Kelly Tyler has been confined to a wheelchair nearly 14 years ago, she refuses to stay there forever. Together with her doting family, Tyler fights daily to spread hope and encouragement to anyone who needs it.
She recently shared her story — every high and every low — in her first book, “Walk it Out.”
“I always knew I would write a book, but I didn’t know what it was going to be about,” she said. “I just knew when it was time to start writing.”
Tyler lived in Wichita Falls until she turned 18 when she left to attend Baylor University.
She met and married her husband, Ryan, during her sophomore year; their first child followed soon after. One more child and a literature degree later and her life was running smoothly, going according to plan.
A few years later, her plans changed.
Tyler wasn’t feeling well in November 1995 and made an appointment with the doctor. Despite her resistance, he encouraged her to accept a tetanus booster. After a lengthy argument, she relented and took the shot.
Ten short days later, she was paralyzed from the neck down.
“It was definitely the shot that set everything off,” Tyler said. “That is the only thing they could come up with.”
Tyler was thrown by the unexpected loss. She had a husband and two young children at home to take care of.
Doctors told her any recovery should take place within the first year; nearly a decade later her health was the same. She was able to move her right arm and hand, but everything else was frozen in place.
“It has changed my life in basically every way,” she said. “Parenting has been difficult. I have to ration my energy. We just kind of help each other.”
Tyler never gave up hope she would walk again. Her faith in God and love for her family kept her going day to day. She and her husband were able to have a third child. She kept him strapped to her chest as a baby, caring for him any way she could.
“It really got interesting when we had a baby,” she said. “I have a very incredible husband, who is very protective. There is just this rock of love.”
After about 10 years, she became able to move her left arm and hand.
“They were completely paralyzed,” she said. “I have a lot more use of my trunk, too, where before I had none. They said that I would not get anything back after the first year. Eventually, I did anyway.”
She was finally able to drive again, to be a little more active. She used the renewed strength to write her first book.
“I thought it was going to give people hope,” she said. “There is life after the whatever. As long as there is life, it needs to be good.”
Since it’s release in December, Tyler has had multiple book signings and speaking engagements near her North Carolina home to as far away as the Ukraine — always encouraging others to give.
“There is no going back,” she said. “Always find a way to give to others. When you’re giving, you’re not thinking about your own situation.”
In the past few years, Tyler has been looking for her own ways to give back. On a trip with her husband to Jamaica, she visited The Blossom Garden Children’s Home in Montego Bay. She asked the staff what they needed.
“The babies’ diapers were only changed once every other day,” she said. “They needed more diapers.”
After purchasing several herself, she took the cause to her husband’s boss at a business dinner that night.
“We told him what we did,” she said. “He gave a speech and asked that if anyone else wanted to give to the orphanage, there would be baskets at the door.”
About $1,700 was raised that night, and the bank matched every penny.
“That’s how life happens,” she said. “Just when you least expect it. Now, we’re just trying to do whatever we can.”
Tyler and her husband founded The Neighborhood Connection, a nonprofit organization that helps orphans.
She stands by her advice: Helping others is the best way to help yourself. As she continues to fight for a complete recovery, Tyler remembers her purpose — to comfort others in similar situations.
“I just always want to encourage people,” she said. “I think anything is possible.”
For more information on Tyler’s story, visit her Web site at www.livingthecall.com.
Isaiah 24:15
Wherefore glorify ye the LORD in the fires.
When my husband and I were planning our wedding, Ryan’s constant prayer was that God would be glorified both in our wedding and in our marriage. I remember reminding him of that prayer when I was in the hospital.
Immediately after I became paralyzed, I was keenly aware that my responses were being closely watched. My biggest concern was that people would mistakenly become angry with God. I was so aware that I was His very real representative and that my response would either reflect His true character and bring Him honor, or reflect my own flesh and make it harder for others to see Him for who He is.
Most of us have been taught our whole Christian lives that we are Christ’s representatives on Earth, but it is even more magnified in the fires of trials and suffering. Jesus said that we would all face tribulation. I think it’s because in God’s economy tribulation gets a lot of bang for the spiritual buck. Most people understand the whole refining idea. The other side of the benefit is that, if we cooperate with the process, it gives God a chance to show Himself for who He really is while everyone is watching.
If, while we are in the fire, we realize the opportunity we have to give God glory we will understand that it is an honor to know and serve such a wonderful God and we’ll be less likely to slip into self pity. Tribulation will come. Will He get glory from your response?
My big jobs of the day were to pay bills and do a conference call with my sons teachers. These have to be among my least favorite things! By the time the call was over, I just put my head down and thought, “I can’t do another thing without worshipping God!” So, I went to Pandora.com. (I am so thankful for technology!) and clicked on my Jason Upton channel. The first song was Psalm 62 by Shane and Shane. It’s all about resting on Him. I felt my whole being sigh in relief to be in His arm again.
I want to always have a low tolerance for doing “stuff” (even the good stuff) and a high need for Him. God likes it when we realize our extreme neediness and fall into His arms often. If we are able to go very far without really connecting to God, we are likely to starve ourselves without even realizing it.
To be in His presence is to be filled with true life that living in this world drains from us. So today stop and remember to breathe in His life giving love. Everything else is like exhaling.
5My soul, wait only upon God and silently submit to Him; for my hope and expectation are from Him.
6He only is my Rock and my Salvation; He is my Defense and my Fortress, I shall not be moved.
7With God rests my salvation and my glory; He is my Rock of unyielding strength and impenetrable hardness, and my refuge is in God!
8Trust in, lean on, rely on, and have confidence in Him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts before Him. God is a refuge for us (a fortress and a high tower). Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!
Well, like I said, the hospital is not where I wanted to start the new year, but that is where I was. It wasn’t too bad at first, but by Tuesday morning I really wanted to go home. Then something interesting happened. God began to move!
He put the most wonderful nurses with me and as we talked people found out about the book. One nurse bought it for her dad. Then another saw the title and said right away that she, too wanted a copy. She said that twice people had given her words from the Lord ending in the sentence, “You are going to have to walk it out.”
Others began to find out and nurses were reading it on break and by the end I was invited to speak at four different places and had sold 12 books! It reminds me that no matter how things look, or how we feel about them, God is always looking for opportunities to show Himself mighty. We just have to give Him the opportunities. The other thing it reminds me is that we really need to be connected to our brothers and sisters. I know things would not have turned out the way they had if people hadn’t been praying for me. Lots and lots of people prayed and because of their prayers, God got the glory!
Now I’m home again, and very glad to be here. I’m just hoping that my many friends who were praying will not stop. There are still so many challenges. We need lots of prayer just for daily living, let alone believing for the miracle we know God wants to give us. Thanks for standing with us until I can stand with you.
The hospital is the last place from which I planned to kick off the new year but here I am! So I feel that my desire to stay focused is already being seriously challenged. Life is full of distractions both from around us and within ourselves.
It always helps to remember how short our time here really is. Hospitals are good reminders. In the same half hour I hear the sweet lullaby announcing a new life and a code red warning the end of another. With such a small unknown amount of time it seems best to have a clear cut understanding of what God is calling us to do and a vision for how to get it done.
At that time the LORD separated the tribe of Levi, to bear the ark of the covenant of the LORD, to stand before the LORD to minister unto him, and to bless in his name, unto this day.
Revelation 1 5And from Jesus Christ, who is the faithful witness, and the first begotten of the dead, and the prince of the kings of the earth. Unto him that loved us, and washed us from our sins in his own blood, 6And hath made us kings and priests unto God and his Father; to him be glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen.
Numbers 16:9
Seemeth it but a small thing unto you, that the God of Israel hath separated you from the congregation of Israel, to bring you near to himself to do the service of the tabernacle of the LORD, and to stand before the congregation to minister untothem?
The one thing we are all called to is to minister to the Lord in worship. If we can get that part down, the rest follows more easily. Making time in our schedules and space in our minds for worship is often the hardest part. Once we understand that we have been called and set apart for Him and we make ministering to God a priority, things start to happen. The grip that our flesh and the world has on us stats to weaken and a passion for God starts to take over. Then the fun really begins! Our hearts and minds are opened to the things of God and His Kingdom and one day we wake up and the fires of His altar have utterly consumed us and we are left with a joy and love that is contagious and we leave that altar and carry His presence to everyone around us in the working out of our Earthly missions.
When I was 14 a guy named Billy Beecham came and preached to our youth group at the First Baptist Church. It was probably the most unforgettable sermon I’ve ever heard. The Holy Spirit was so obviously present. I still remember one of the songs we sang during worship and how desperately my heart cried out to God. I wanted as much of God as I could get.
Then Billy Beecham stood up and preached the best news I’d ever heard. He said, “You can have as much of God as you want!” I grabbed hold of those words and ran with it. I didn’t have to be left waiting in the outer courts longing for nearness with the object of my passion. I could enter into the Holy of Holies. I had no idea how many battles it would require and I didn’t care. I wanted Him and I realized He wanted me even more. I determined then that nothing would get in my way!
I wasn’t exactly considered to be a “well rounded” kid. I decided there were a lot of things I could pursue but that would take time away from my one real passion, Jesus. There were a lot of things I could have done differently had I been more mature, but I don’t regret one minute that I spent seeking God. I don’t wish I went to more parties or more football games. Maybe I was a little odd, but no on ever did anything great by making following the crowd her goal.
So here I am decades later and I still want more and more of God. I know I can have more but I also know the responsibility is on me. Jesus already did His part. Now I have to decide how badly I really want this intimacy with God that I long for and how much I’m willing to sacrifice to get it. Dividing time between spouses, kids and work takes more discernment than just not going to a football game. We could easily rationalize or “guilt” ourselves out of time with God and miss everything He has for us. It reminds me of the old Keith Green song that says, “I pledge my head, I pledge my wife. I pledge my son to Heaven for the gospel.”
The bottom line is this: nothing is more important than seeking God. The other thing Billy said that I’ll never forget was, “Get usable and God will wear you out!” The more of Jesus and the less of ourselves in our lives the more he can use us. One of my friends used to teasingly call me a monk because I was so content to just seek God, but the reality is when we seek Him, he sends us out. The only way to “get usable” is to spend a lot of time with the Lord, die to ourselves and be filled with Him. That’s it. It’s not easy, but it’s simple.
I never want to lose the edge of that passionate 14 year old kid. Nothing really matters but Him. Nothing.
Passage Mark 4:19:
19Then the cares and anxieties of the world and distractions of the age, and the pleasure and delight and false glamour and deceitfulness of riches, and the craving and passionate desire for other things creep in and choke and suffocate the Word, and it becomes fruitless.
Unfortunately, I must confess that this verse could be stamped across 2008 for me. The anxieties and distractions were many, and although I didn’t run off and join the circus or anything crazy, I have felt that creeping and suffocating feeling that comes when I get distracted by the things of this world. Marriage, children, financial obligations and health issues can be overwhelming and can become real distractions.
Colossians 3:2 says, “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.” It really doesn’t matter how good or seemingly important the things on Earth seem (like family or even ministry) they will distract us from what our focus should be (Jesus) if we are not diligent. I was very focused on the Lord as a teen and I had a youth minister tell me once that if I got too Heavenly minded I’d be no Earthly good. I don’t think we need to worry about that. Becoming religious will destroy you and your witness, but truly keeping a Kingdom focus will steer you right into the heart of God, which will in turn thrust you into the middle of broken humanity where He can use you.
I have a fierceness in my heart right now. I absolutely refuse to be taken off course by life! I am angry that the enemy would try to interfere with God’s plans for me and I am angry with myself for becoming distracted. I am in a “take no prisoners” kind of mood. I am not willing to lose the edge that the Lord has given to a few little distractions like the economy or illness or whatever!
I am going to begin the new year with a fast and I encourage you to do the same. It is one of the best tools the Lord has given us (not to mention that Mark 2:20 makes it clear that we are to be fasting) to clear our minds of worldly clutter and maintain our focus.
I not only desire to have the Lord as the focus of my life, I truly believe that this year it will prove to be absolutely vital! Blessings to you as you seek Him and His direction for this new season.
For some reason, this year more than others, it feels good to have the holidays winding down. The gifts are unwrapped and it’s time to wrap up the year.
Whether it’s good or bad, I’m ready for a new year with new challenges. It feels good to shed the skin of all that happened this year, and focus on new things. I’m definitely not one to dwell on the past. There are good memories that are worth remembering and bad ones that sometimes haunt me, but my focus is on what God wants to do now. He always seems to be up to doing “a new thing” and I don’t want to miss it.
I want to hear what He is saying and stay in step with where He is going. Sometimes the places He leads us are not places we’d choose to go on our own, but I’d still rather be in the unfamiliar with Him than in my comfort zone without His presence. This is a really good time to set ourselves apart to listen to the voice of God so that we know what His direction for us is in the coming season.
Isaiah 42:9
Behold, the former things are come to pass, and new things do I declare: before they spring forth I tell you of them.
The very first person at my very first book signing was a lovely lady I’d never met with a very cool name; Logan. She sat down and right away started talking to me, asking questions and treating me like a friend she hadn’t seen in a week. Then she started to open up and she told me about the abusive marriage she was in and how no one really knew how bad it had gotten. She’d only been married about a year. The more she talked, the more convinced I became that she had to get away from her husband for her own safety. I begged her to go to the police and even offered to go with her. She thanked me but declined the offer.
Two weeks later she had an appointment to get her hair done and never showed up. Our friend and hair stylist, Arnella went to her house to check on her. No one came to the door, and as she turned to go down the steps, Arnella was met by two FBI agents. Logan’s husband had reported her missing since Halloween. Logan remained missing for weeks. During that time, Arnella had a recurring dream of Logan calling out to her that she was cold and wet.
In November Logan Edward’s body was recovered from a river in South Carolina. Subsequently, her husband confessed to the murder.
I am so saddened by this event. I wish there was more I could have done. I don’t know what that could have been, but I just wish I could have done more. Many times we try to isolate ourselves from how evil, evil really is, but events like this remind us how far from home we really are in this world. We really are just passing through with the sole purpose of bringing the Light of Jesus to a very dark world. It reminds me of the significance of every “chance meeting” and the importance of every soul.
I keep waiting for something redemptive to come from this, but it’s just not there. I know that Logan loved the Lord and that she is with him. That is our consolation. Nothing can prepare a family for this kind of news. Please pray for Logan’s mom, daughter, grandchildren and sisters.
I read a story this morning that gripped my heart. Conjoined twins who were born to a teenager in England had to be separated on Christmas day. The twins were named Faith and Hope. Tragically, only one of the babies survived. Hope died. Hope’s lungs were not strong enough to support her. The doctor put it like this, “The lungs of Faith were somehow supporting Hope.”
Tears came to my eyes as I realized the message in the lives of these precious babies. We live in days and times that are causing people to search for hope. People look in all kinds of places for it. The fact is, though, that faith and hope are conjoined twins. There is no hope outside faith in Jesus Christ. It just can’t survive the traumas of this world. It is faith that breathes life into hope.
I am struck by God’s amazing ways. He sent a beautiful baby at Christmas that was destined to die in order to bring a message of hope. I pray that the family of Hope truly know what a miraculous little messenger they were blessed to behold.
Here are some photos of my son Josh in the Christmas play at church. He was Joseph.
Congratulations to the whole cast. You were great!
