There is always so much going on in my life and, especially now, in the world, that I really could spend all day and all night taking care of my family, doing what needs to be done and turning over and over in my mind and my prayers all of the problems I face and see around me. I have to remind myself and be reminded often that although these things may be pressing, they are also distractions. The hungry and hurting need us. The lost need us. Our families certainly need us but we were not created for the lost or the hungry or our families. We were not created for our careers or ministries or for our own pleasure.
It is simple and it is profound. We were created for one thing and that is to be deeply connected to and in intimate relationship with Jesus. He is both the God of the universe and the Son of Man who still loves to hang out with sinners. He always has time and is never in a hurry. It seems that when I have those times of deep fellowship, those incredible encounters behind the veil, I am so overcome by His love and how He has forgiven and rescued me that all I can do is weep. It’s not a sadness but a thankfulness. In the secret place with Jesus is really the only place that we can clearly see who we are and who He is and that revelation coupled with knowledge of what He has done for me disarms me completely.
It reminds me of the story of Mary Magdelene. She had seen and heard Jesus before I’m sure and in the light of her own desperate need and the revelation of exactly who He was all she wanted to do was to pour out the best of what she had and kiss his feet (that’s how I feel!). The men around her scoffed and pointed out that the oil she “wasted” on Jesus could have been sold and given to the poor but really they were just uncomfortable with an expression of such real worship and raw honesty that they themselves were unwilling or unable to enter into. If we are to be truly in His presence, except for on superficial terms, we cannot hide who we really are. We cannot hide our human depravity and the many wounds that come along with being human. When we take that step, we realize that our sins and hurts are met with a love so incredible and by a God so pure that the only sane response is to fall in love with Him and worship at His feet.
That’s how it is every time. Over and over again I fall in love with Him. I can’t play beautiful music or even sing a song in tune so I weep in His presence and write a few feeble words and long for Him with every fiber of my being when I am not in that place. Right now, if I could sing, it would be this song. Enjoy and worship Him.
Luke 7:36-40 NLT
36 One of the Pharisees asked Jesus to have dinner with him, so Jesus went to his home and sat down to eat. 37 When a certain immoral woman from that city heard he was eating there, she brought a beautiful alabaster jar filled with expensive perfume. 38 Then she knelt behind him at his feet, weeping. Her tears fell on his feet, and she wiped them off with her hair. Then she kept kissing his feet and putting perfume on them.
39 When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, “If this man were a prophet, he would know what kind of woman is touching him. She’s a sinner!”
40 Then Jesus answered his thoughts. “Simon,” he said to the Pharisee, “I have something to say to you.”
“Go ahead, Teacher,” Simon replied.
41 Then Jesus told him this story: “A man loaned money to two people—500 pieces of silver[i] to one and 50 pieces to the other. 42 But neither of them could repay him, so he kindly forgave them both, canceling their debts. Who do you suppose loved him more after that?”
43 Simon answered, “I suppose the one for whom he canceled the larger debt.”
“That’s right,” Jesus said. 44 Then he turned to the woman and said to Simon, “Look at this woman kneeling here. When I entered your home, you didn’t offer me water to wash the dust from my feet, but she has washed them with her tears and wiped them with her hair.45 You didn’t greet me with a kiss, but from the time I first came in, she has not stopped kissing my feet. 46 You neglected the courtesy of olive oil to anoint my head, but she has anointed my feet with rare perfume.
47 “I tell you, her sins—and they are many—have been forgiven, so she has shown me much love. But a person who is forgiven little shows only little love.” 48 Then Jesus said to the woman, “Your sins are forgiven.”
49 The men at the table said among themselves, “Who is this man, that he goes around forgiving sins?”
50 And Jesus said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.”